


I'll Be There

by DramamineOnTopOfMe



Series: Buddie First Kisses [15]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Christmas, Cuddling, First Kiss, M/M, Secret Santa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:34:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28343997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DramamineOnTopOfMe/pseuds/DramamineOnTopOfMe
Summary: Buck has some holiday anxiety and Eddie's got an idea on how to help him.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: Buddie First Kisses [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1716106
Comments: 6
Kudos: 79
Collections: Buddie Discord Secret Elf 2020





	I'll Be There

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dumbhuman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dumbhuman/gifts).



> This is a gift for Sarah! I hope they like it! Title is from I'll Be There by Jackson 5, I was fucking flailing about it. I'm sorry if it doesn't fit but y'know. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Fuck 2020, y'know the drill. I come in here to complain about make people think I'm an asshole. (I promise that I'm not, most of the time)
> 
> Sarah I hope you like it. I know I said that up above but now I'm talking to you directly. (I also think we should still meet up sometime)

To say he’s a bit upset and disgruntled is one thing. But really, Eddie’s been watching Buck pace back and forth across his kitchen for the better part of ten minutes now and his friend hasn’t let up since he walked in the door. Better yet, Buck won’t come out about what the problem is. “Buck, seriously, sit down. I don’t understand what the problem is.” He continues to pace, only offering a huff and a sideways glance. Did something happen on the shift today that he doesn’t know about? Did he do something? God, is this the beginning of a lecture? He can’t handle a lecture from Buck. Shannon seemingly gave them all the time when he came home from work but he doesn’t want it happening again. “Buck, did I do something?” 

He stops mid-step, eyes going wide, “What? No, you didn’t do anything Eds.” 

“Alright, then tell me what the problem is.” He rolls his eyes at Eddie and continues to pad back and forth, “You’re going to ruin my floors if you keep that up, sit down and tell me what’s wrong.” 

“I’m just stressed, okay. I feel  _ wrong.  _ I don’t know,” he pauses for just a moment, but it’s long enough for Eddie to reach forward and grab his hand. “I’m sorry,” he shuffles a few steps, giving into Eddie’s request. Their knees brush as he sits down. Eddie moves his fingers down to Buck’s wrist and rubs along his pulse point. 

“You don’t have to be sorry, Buck, you know that.” Eddie leans his head down a little to catch Buck’s gaze, “Hey, what can I do for you, man?” 

After a second of hesitation, Buck lifts his head and looks at the couch, “Can we lay down?” Then after another second, he shakes his head, “No, never mind, sorry. I know you don’t-” 

“Okay, let’s lay down, come on,” Eddie cuts him off. He wants to help and if this is what Buck needs, this is what he’s going to do. They stand together, chests bumping as they stretch. “You leaning on me or am I leaning on you?” Buck doesn’t respond, instead he jumps over the back of the couch to lay across the length of it. Eddie blinks a few times, staring. Does he want Eddie to lay on him? 

His best friend pats his chest once, “Please?” and that’s enough to get him to move. He maneuvers around the couch, instead of jumping over it, like Buck. He realized a while ago that he’d go to the ends of the Earth for his best friend. He’d do anything in his power to make him feel better. The lawsuit shook him, but they figured it out. He leans over Buck, his hand on the back of the couch. “Just lay on top of me?” It’s more of a question than a statement. Buck looks small under him, uncertain and scared. 

WIthout a word, he nods and lays down on top of him. Their legs slot together and Eddie shimmies down just enough that his head can lay on Buck’s chest. “This okay?” 

A hum of approval sounds under him. He’s got his ear pressed to his chest and the sound vibrates the side of his face. Buck’s arms wind around him tightly. He pulls Eddie up a few inches so his face fits into Buck’s neck. “There,” he mumbles. 

He’s never minded silence, he actually prefers it. But with Buck it’s different. He’s usually so loud and lively, sitting in the living room with only the sound of the fan is strange. 

Eddie doesn’t want to bother him too much, but he’s still curious about what the problem is. “Hey, Buck,” his nose crinkles a little as he whispers. 

“Mmm,” 

“You gonna talk to me or are we going to sit here in silence.” 

“You don’t like talking about feelings.” Buck’s tone is short. 

“It’s weird not having you tell me what’s wrong right away,” Eddie sits up a little and pulls his head out of Buck’s neck. He doesn’t know what he’s expecting the answer to be. Minutes pass with more silence. The sound of Buck’s breath, sometimes shallow with the occasional deep breath, fills the room. 

Buck’s heartbeat rattles in his chest. It stutters around his ribcage in a concerning manner that makes Eddie wonder. Did he lie about it being about Eddie? Is Maddie OK? What’s going on? “Buck-” 

He pushes Eddie away roughly, “I’ll just head home. Thanks for letting me stay for a while.” Eddie nearly falls off of the couch and scrambles for purchase on anything. His fingers grip the fabric of the couch and he manages to stable himself. 

“Hey, I-” he drops his weight back down, catching Buck’s attention, “I can help, I promise. I just- I was expecting you to want to talk about it.” 

“I don’t know what the problem is! And you’re asking about it every second! I-” He screws his eyes shut. “I don’t like the holidays. I don’t know, they stress me out.” His voice cracks once and he clears his throat. Eddie watches curiously, he recognizes the signs now; nervous pacing; stuttering heartbeat; various breaths; Buck’s anxious. 

“Do you trust me?” Buck settles momentarily at the question. Their eyes meet and tears are dotting the corners of his best friend’s eyes. “Let’s go to bed, Buck. Come on,” Eddie’s off of him a second later and extending his hand. “I’ve got you, man.” Buck grips his hand tightly. There’s a sheen of nervous sweat covering his skin. Buck follows him closely into the bedroom. Eddie sheds his shirt at the door, letting go of Buck’s hand. As he strips his pants near the bathroom door, he says, “Make yourself comfortable.” 

Out of the corner of his eye, he watches Buck strip down to his boxers. Eddie jumps under the covers on the right side and pulls back the blanket on the left. He slides in softly but leans away from Eddie. Eddie doesn’t like that, so he scoots closer. Buck still leans his body away.    
  
“Buck, come here. We’re supposed to be cuddling.” 

“I didn’t think you wanted to.” His voice is quiet. 

“Of course I want to. Come here. Lay on my chest. I have an idea.” Buck scoots closer at the request. But he only leans his head on Eddie’s shoulder. He sighs before pulling his best friend completely on top of him, reversing the position from the couch. Buck’s still and tight, nervous. “Hey, just breathe, it’s alright.” He coos quietly. His fingers run along Buck’s spine in an attempt to begin calming him down. 

Buck’s breathing stutters every once in a while, but after a few minutes, he finally gets it under control. It feels like Buck’s finally sinking into his hold when he switches up his movements. Instead of dancing along his spine, Eddie draws shapes on his shoulder blades. Buck lets go of a large sigh and cuddles into Eddie properly. He shoves his nose into Eddie’s neck as he nuzzles closely. 

Eddie reminds himself to stay relaxed as Buck’s left hand finds its way to the back of Eddie’s neck and he starts playing softly with the hair there. It only takes a second because the feeling of someone playing with his hair causes him to sag.    
  
A few more minutes pass in silence. “Chris is really excited to have you spend Christmas with us, you know,” he starts, “I think this is the first year that we’ve had someone other than family over for the holidays.” Buck grunts, moving his head a little back and forth. “I spent the holidays with my family growing up but after Shannon got pregnant, we didn’t come out to family gatherings as often. I remember learning about Chris’s CP and thinking that we’d have to make all these changes and be really careful with him. We didn’t, I know that now. And I think it’s stupid that I worried so much. I cost him some memories with our families growing up.” 

Buck mumbles something incoherent into his neck. Eddie doesn’t press. Instead he continues to draw circles on his best friend’s back. Upon moving his head, he realizes that if he wants to, he can press kisses into the skin on Buck’s shoulder. It’s right in front of him, his skin is warm and inviting. 

“I’m excited to have people over for the holidays again. Or, at least spend the holidays with other people.”

Buck mumbles against his skin again. Then he pulls his head away enough to be understood, “Holidays were weird for us. Once Maddie left it was like they didn’t exist. I don’t know if it was because she was the reason they celebrated or if she was the reason they stopped.” 

Eddie stops moving along his skin. As he tenses, Buck presses a thigh in between his own. He picks himself up a bit, leaning on his elbows above Eddie. “So what, you think that you’re not good enough to celebrate the holidays with?” Buck frowns. “Dude, that’s fucking stupid. They’re stupid if they don’t want to celebrate Christmas with you. Chris has been begging me to ask you to stay for Christmas and I haven’t gotten to it yet because I know that we both might have to work but-” he pauses, “I want you here if you want to be here.”

“I’d love to be here, Eds.” Buck leans back down and their chests press together. Warmth travels across his body. He’s elated and can’t stop his next action. Eddie presses a chaste kiss to the corner of Buck’s mouth, humming happily. Buck tilts his head to catch Eddie’s mouth before he pulls away fully. 

“Better tell Chris that his Buck is staying for Christmas this year.” Buck snorts then curls back into Eddie’s chest. 

  
  



End file.
